Tea Anyone?

With a moose, a buffalo and a bag of evil pigeons turned into jellybeans under my belt, I can finally take a well deserved vacation in paradise… or NOT! Oh well, I can always daydream while having timbits (I wonder if Tim Horton had the idea while playing hockey?) Please dip in dear earthling friends (may contain caterpillars). Oh, since you’re here, allow me to entertain you with a wacky hat I found at a garage sale. Neat eh?

(Please don't feed the wabbit)

Minkey Girl over & out

P.S. For the bouncy and the curious, I do not, nor ever have worked at Timmy’s. I’m friendly, but NOT that friendly…

Coconutz FM 100 playing: Queen-It's a Kind of Magic

MINKEY GIRL'S BIRTHDAY BASH

Well there goes another birthday. Friends from around the galaxy, huge chocolate cake, lots of ice cream and banana daiquiris. Then there was the pinata fun... We all got a nice, big bump on our heads (some even got worse!) Never give a blindfolded Cylon a baseball bat and have some spare cocktails for angry wookies (correction, have some tranquilizers handy)...

Minkey Girl over & out

Coconutz FM 100 playing: Iron Maiden-Can I Play With Madness

EARTHLING CITIZENS ASK MINKEY.

Dear Minkey Girl,

I'm a huge fan and love the way you kick butt! Minkey, what do you do if you come across one of these?

Hugs & kisses xxx

Dana aka Danish Cow

P.S. Would you please sign my flower pot?

Dear Danish Cow,

Well first I’d say “Whoa! What an ugly bugger”. I’d immediately do the ‘wuga wuga’ move on him and knock him out (Fight like a Minkey Vol III). If you miss the first time DO NOT PANIC! Jump onto the nearest tree (training on your jumps is vital for your survival so practice daily). Now probably he’s gonna move forward and go “Arrrgh!” so now you’re facing his back (tip: this type doesn’t have very good eyesight). His heinie is his weakest spot so throw a few boxes of itch powder (preferably Minkey brand) that’ll distract him so you get another go at the ‘wuga wuga’ move and hopefully succeed! Once he’s knocked out and falls down, you’ll have to make a long, strong rope with whatever you find around you (Minkey Handy book 2nd Edition out Sept 20th). You have to be very quick and tie the rope around the monster’s belly before he wakes up, so you can hook him up to your spaceship (if you don’t have one no worries. Gotta dump a monster? Call Minkey Junk Picker). One more thing, once all that’s done, climb on his belly, put a gas mask on (preferably Minkey Mask available exclusively at Minkeysupplies.com) because this kind is well known for hating mouthwash. Then, throw a rope around the monster’s tooth and pull it out to keep as a trophy (you didn’t think that your friends were just gonna believe your story did ya?). If all goes well, assuming you were super fast or still alive by pure luck and the monster is still asleep, hop onto your spaceship and dump the monster to the sea. If the monster awakes during the flight don’t despair (better have the ‘How to Fly a Rocking Spaceship Manual’ handy), let him fall immediately to the water for this kind cannot swim, haha. Well Danish, if you get a chance to hunt a monster one day, your name will go on the Minkey Hall of Fame, you’ll receive a sticker saying ‘So, you’ve killed your 1st monster eh?’ and free ice cream for a whole month. Now that’s worth fighting for!

Minkey Girl over & out

Coconutz FM 100 playing: Talking Heads-Psycho Killer

NEWS FROM THE BANANAVILLE GAZETTE

HEADLINES:

-Harold reveals to Minkey Girl that he might not be a Sasquatch after all, because most Canadians call him “Moose”.
-Pointy White Beard Elders protest against littering and dangers of banana peels on streets.
-Mayor Munky disappointed in recent Sasquatch events, though happy with the pumpkin pies that Minkey Girl sent him.

SPECIAL REPORT

Minkey Girl Making New Allies

On our special report we follow Minkey Girl on a typical field trip on Earth, in search of very needed allies, for fight against evil entities. As our crew arrives at Minkey Girl headquaters (at an undisclosed location) and take off our blindfolds, we sense some tension in the air. Still, we are spoilt by MG’s hospitality and receive mango juice along with other delicious earthling refreshments. We soon find out that the Minkey Squad is troubled with some bad news about the Evil Pigeons joining forces with the Evil Seagulls. We are soon asked to change into earthling outfits to be less conspicuous and briefed by MG. It is amazing to see the elite Minkey Squad at work and transform into their ingenious disguises. We set of to a nearby forest that is privately owned and take our places in this specially designed cage wagon that is pulled by an earthling transporting device called a “tractor”, along with a bunch of annoying earthlings called “tourists”. It is a long, bumpy, narrow trail and strange earthling beasts in every corner. We soon understand why MG had been complaining about these small, flying, earthling creatures called “bugs”. There are lots of them and they bite us badly. The trip is harsh and the air is boiling hot. MG recalls “The loudest Quebecer man was sitting right next to me making my ears rust (only Canadians can understand the agony…). On my other side, the cutest baby girl sat and spoke in a weird dialect “yaya, dudu, googoo” and several times tried to pull off my tin hat. Later our team was able to translate it to “watch out for those antlers, they poke you in unwanted spots”. MG with all her excellent spy skills and the use of manipulation (a bucket of lamb chops) is able to meet the buffalo leader Burnaby The Great. Overall, the meeting goes well and Burnaby gives a long list of conditions to consider an alliance. MG gives us a glimpse of the now classified list:
- A week long vacation in Jamaica.
- Stay at Holiday Inn.
- Free room service.
- Have only RED M&M’s in the room daily.
- Have Evian bottled water at all times.
- A private masseuse.

- Free laser hair removal sessions.
- Surfing lessons, etc.

Moki reporting

Coconutz FM 100 playing: Bob Marley-Buffalo Soldier

MINKEY GIRL NOW RECRUITING FOR MINKEY SQUAD

It was a one loooooooong, hot weekend (Monday was labor day here in Canada). Perfect time to go on a Sasquatch hunt, no I mean to go looking for new members for my elite Minkey Squad. Here I give you the names of the new, brave chipmunks that joined me. Oh, by the way, these are a few of my brilliant disguises…

“Bruno the Thunderous” Favorite quote “I love marshmallows”.

“Sandy the Drama Queen” Favorite quote “Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful”.

“Black Beard Sammy” Favorite quote “Come show me how ye bury yer treasure, lad!” Behind us Sammy’s sidekick “Lucky Duke of Henderland”.


“336 Royal Quakie Air Cadet Squadron”



“Minkey Girl looking for beavers on the treacherous river”.

P.S. Like my T-Shirt?

Announcements: Happy Birthday Kayla! Happy Birthday Kayla! Happy Birthday Kayla!

Minkey Girl over & out

Coconutz FM 100 playing: Carl Douglas-Kung Fu Fighting