Minkey Girl Hotline For The Severely Troubled and Whacked-out Earthlings
Lost in space? Your mommy forgot to pick you up? Do you have evil attacking turkey phobia? Do you see bananas in pajamas? Do you feel aggravated if you don’t get your lollipop? Is the boogeyman still hiding in your shower? Do your garden gnomes pee on your plants? Does your cow want to fly? Did the pigeons poop on your favorite dress? Did your ice cream fall off the cone? Do you dream of sorting out your laundry with your favorite star? Do ugly, green beings continue to interrupt your tea parties? Does your chicken want to become famous? Is your cockaleekie on fire? Does your neighbour steal your rainbow colored clothespins? Did your teddy bear go on a walkabout? Are the house elves stinking your house? Do you want to win the bubble gum blowing contest? Do you need an evil zebra outfit for Halloween? Does your penguin do the hula dance? Does the neighborly Sasquatch like trying on your shoes? Do you need any intruders zapped? Do you want any family/friends to be abducted? Are you embarrassed to get lice shampoo from the drugstore? Do you simply need more duct tape or to be tickled?
Suffer no more! Call Minkey Girl now!
Suffer no more! Call Minkey Girl now!
888-555-0000 OR E-mail minkey_girl@hotmail.com. Helping earthlings since potty training. THE PINK COW IS OUT THERE!
We’d like to hear from you! Please list your other daily troubles below.
P.S. The first 10 callers will get a free portable toothbrush and a pack of ultimate popping monkey gum.
Minkey Girl over & out
posted by Minkey girl @ 2:55 PM
23 comments
23 Comments:
Help! Minkey Girl,
the neighbour's cat just peed into my sunflower pot. The damage is done! My only witness is the startled bumble bee that feel off the flower as it immediately let it's head hang down.
That cat is denying any involvement in this.
It all happened after eating a very strange tasting banana. ..
Hey minkey girl! If i'm insane by choice does that count as a problem? I guess not. Oh well. spazzy kittens. Anyway Love your blog. Check mine out if you like, and maybe gimme some advice on how to make it better? Anyway... i must go now, my village is missing its idiot.
~~Ask me about microwaving cats for fun and profit~~
I regulary see Do you see bananas in pajamas. Infact i am a pyjama maker and my biggest clients ARE infact 7ft tall bananas. I think they would be extremely annoyed at your new hotline and you know how annoyed giant bananas can get.
Hmmm, interesting Katz! Does your microwave transport the cat to another planet? And Mr. Beck you better start sewing bananas striped suits, they shouldn't be walking around in pyjamas.
Fio, the special minkey squad is working on your case. Our specialists are examining the urine sample right this minute...
oh good, we are hoping for evidence (us being me and the bumble bee who is still suffering from a severe headache. his name is Jake.)
you have no idea how hard i just laughed! I'm FREAKEN HOWLING RIGHTN NOW!!! I'm SO LOVIN this blog!
My walk isn't silly enough. Can you contact the Ministry of Silly Walks for me and get me a grant or something?
Madam Fio, the cat has confessed it all after going to our spankotorium. We will give you not one, but TWO pots of sunflowers and a pink pill for your bumble bee. Thanks for using MG hotline!
Thank You for this service to mankind.
What do blind people dream about?
Emmm, they dream about cooking with the swedish chef?? Mr. Rizzo that can be arranged with our talented ducks.
No my microwave doesnt really transport them. It kind of makes them resemble the insides of a jelly doughnut, red, squishy, and strawberry flavoured.
Muffy, try spraying their beaks with bitter apple that should do it.
Our minkey squad will use their egg throwing weapons on them!
Thx Jess, I'm glad u like it here :)
THANKS FOR COMING ACROSS MY BLOG & COMMENTING ! Stop by anytime & drop a gurl a line ! I luv your blog too ! VERY FUNNY !!
rantings and ravings....i'm glad your fam/relatives in England are ok!
hey MG you know those pooping pigeons well whenever i walk out the door they poop on me so i have to go back in the house to wash off but if i go back out they will poop on me again...and they only do it to me have any advise?
liss
Umbrella, umbrella, umbrella :). Also gear up with a big watergun, they'll hate that!
HA This site is wacked!!!!!! i like it!!!!!! Muahahahaha hehe. Have you really seen the pink cow??? is it flight challenged?
Nobody has ever seen the Pink Cow, but I have faith!! :)
Cool Planet. It might be time for me to step into the Portal again for some space travel...
Badtz Maruuuuuuu!
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